Ask a Small Favour
Someone who does you a small favour likes you more afterwards — more than someone you did a favour for.
- Evidence
- shaky
- Topic
- Influence
- Things to do
- 3
- Read
- 1 min
shakyHow strong is the evidence?
Real, but smaller and shakier than the story you have probably heard.
- Jecker & Landy, Human Relations, 1969
- Benjamin Franklin's borrowed book, Autobiography
Check it yourself: doi.org/10.1177/001872676902200407
A correction to this entry
Downgraded from solid. This rests on a single study from 1969 that has rarely been repeated. The anecdote is older than the evidence.
Why it works
Having helped you, they resolve the inconsistency by concluding they must like you. The act comes first and the feeling follows it.
What to do about it
- Ask a rival or a cool acquaintance for something small and specific: an opinion, a recommendation, a book.
- Make it easy to grant and easy to refuse. Then thank them concretely.
- Give them a way to be competent. People enjoy being asked for expertise more than for effort.
Where people go wrong
Asking for something large, or repeatedly. The effect runs on small, occasional, genuine requests.
Read next
- The Seven LeversReciprocity · Commitment & consistency · Social proof · Authority · Liking · Scarcity · Unity.proven
- Give a Reason, Any ReasonCompliance with a small request rose from 60% to 93% when the ask included the word “because” — even with a meaningless reason.solid
- Small Yes FirstAgreement to a tiny request substantially raises agreement to a much larger related one later.solid
- Name What They're Feeling“It seems like…” / “It sounds like…” — naming the other side's emotion defuses it and gets you information.untested